Have you ever felt like you’re doing everything you can to connect with your partner, but it’s just not landing? Maybe you’re looking for reassurance, and they respond with, “You’re overthinking it,” or you’re hoping for closeness, but they seem to pull away.

• If you have anxious attachment style and you’re wanting tools to help you shift toward secure, using a somatic or body-based approach is very helpful.

• For a lot of people with anxious attachment, it’s common to seek reassurance, love, and validation from a partner, which can sometimes make relationships feel uncertain or stressful. These attachment patterns often start early in life and don’t just affect how we feel emotionally—they also show up in our bodies.

• When I was certified as a dynamic attachment practitioner, I learned just how important body awareness is for shifting toward secure attachment, and it was a big part of my own journey toward finding secure love.

Is it better to work on your attachment system by learning and thinking about attachment, and taking practical steps to change your behavior (a top down approach), or by accessing the felt sense/working with body sensations, working on calming the nervous system, and feeling what secure feels like in your body (a bottom up approach)?

6 ways to increase your secure attachment

Why do we attract incompatible partners and what do we do about it?

You may have been hearing story after story lately of friend breakups and people ending long relationships. If it seems like you’ve been hearing more stories like this since the pandemic started, it’s not your imagination — people have been struggling with relationships of all kinds, and that includes friendships.

The surprising link between genetics and attachment — and some hopeful news

Researchers have discovered some interesting links between the style we developed as children and the health problems we have as adults

Anytime we experience stress from our environment, it can impact a romantic relationship. We turn to our relationships for comfort and stress relief, but can there be too much of a good thing? Yet some couples are handling this with more ease than others, and we can find some answers in attachment theory.

Helpful exercises so you can get your Zs

It’s more than just a desire for independence

Some quick mood-boosting tips to lift your spirits